Not On Assignment

A journo's jottings under no deadline pressure (since Jan 1, 2010)

Archive for July 2011

Eavesdropping: In which what matters is the circumference of the eye

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One male friend to another:
“The office party got over and she tagged along with me. She was very drunk.
`Where would you like to go? Would you like me to drop you home?’ I asked her.
`No, let’s catch an auto and drive around for some time,’ she replied.
In the auto I asked her, `It’s very late. Don’t you want to go home?’
She smiled that sweet smile of hers and asked me a question in return: `If you were married and had a 20-year-old daughter and if she came home drunk, how would you feel?’
We sat in silence for some time.
Suddenly she told me, `The auto driver is staring at me in the mirror.’
I didn’t know what to say so I started laughing.
After some time I asked her, `Why did you agree to come with me?’
`Because you are safe.’
`And how did you arrive at that conclusion?’
Her answer stumped me.
`That’s because you have very large eyes.’ “

Written by Raju Bist

July 31, 2011 at 11:11 pm

Posted in Eavesdropping

Superman On Wheels

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The best thing about Bombay is that you never know when or where you may bump into one more quirky character.
Yesterday the city was lashed by the first big showers and as HT aptly headlined it `100 mm rain, 100% misery’. The roads were flooded, the train services went for a toss and flights were delayed by more than two hours.
Friend and colleague SI, who brings the car to office every day, wisely took an autorickshaw – only to find himself in the middle of a massive traffic jam. But his enterprising auto driver assured him, “Don’t worry sahab, I will make sure that you reach office on time!”
He took one shortcut after another and zipped his three-wheeler through narrow bylanes, all the while keeping up a stream of non-stop pitter-patter: “Arey sahab, so what if the Rain Gods have no mercy on us Mumbaikars? You have started off from home for work. I will make sure that you reach office safe and sound.”
And Superman On Wheels was true to his word.
SI reached office – in lesser time than if he had come by car.

Written by Raju Bist

July 9, 2011 at 12:16 pm

Posted in Uncategorized