Not On Assignment

A journo's jottings under no deadline pressure (since Jan 1, 2010)

Archive for January 2010

Somebody has made my day

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An old colleague, NM, had posted this on one the million social networks of which RB is a member:
The best part about getting drenched in the rains is that you know you can go back to a cozy home, get a hot shower, have a good meal and sleep under a warm blanket… thank you God for this feeling… thank you God for everything!
I responded and this is how our exchange continued:
RB: Being grateful for life’s blessings is the hallmark of a wise person! 🙂
NM: Thanks Raju… I always thought your last name should have been Bliss instead of Bist…love your knack of making people feel special… haven’t found anyone else who could do it better than you… 🙂
RB: Wow… that’s the best thing anybody has said to me in a long time… thanx a million for the compliment… 🙂

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Written by Raju Bist

January 17, 2010 at 10:03 pm

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Saying the first hello

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Often, the first impressions we form about people turn out to be half-baked opinions.
I was under the impression that a gentleman staying in a neighbouring building was arrogant, opinionated and a die-hard supporter of the ‘sons-of-the-soil’ theory.
Till I went out of my way to wish him a “Hello” the other evening.
He turned out an amiable, knowledgeable, friendly middle-aged man.
We spoke at length about his son’s recent college admission, the magazine I work for and his correct assessment of it being a publication for the classes and not the masses, the wide disparity between the haves and the have-nots in our country, his sticking to his first job for the last 24 years, his travels to my native place (Garhwal) being put on hold due to the exams and coaching classes of his two sons, their dancing skills, etc.
I don’t know what he thought of our conversation.
But I came away thinking it was an half hour well-spent.

Written by Raju Bist

January 10, 2010 at 9:48 pm

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Story in a cab

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Morning Newspaper Headline: 39 city pilgrims die in Nashik bus plunge
“Come sahab. Yes, I will take you to Byculla station. I will drop you to your destination and then go to Nair Hospital. I have just been informed that a relative was one of those injured in the Nashik bus tragedy. I don’t know how serious he is or if at this moment he is alive at all.
“All accidents are a result of human negligence. Look at me. I have been driving a cab in Bombay for the last 26 years but have not been involved in a single accident. If someone wants to overtake me from the left, I don’t lose my cool and allow him to go ahead. I must be the safest cabbie in Bombay. I drive slowly and very, very carefully.
“Twelve years ago, Uttam Xxxxxx (surname withheld), a corporator from a central Bombay ward, offered me a job to drive his vehicle to Pune three times a week. On the very first trip he rebuked me saying I drove very slowly. When we returned to Bombay I handed him his car keys saying I didn’t want his job.
“A week later, another driver was taking the corporator’s family to Pune. At Panvel, the car ploughed into a water tanker. In two seconds flat, Uttam’s entire family was wiped out.
“When I met him, I shouted ‘You are a chutiya!’ He didn’t get angry. Instead, he started crying loudly.
Sahab, you rarely hear of ST or BEST bus drivers involved in serious accidents. That’s because they don’t work for a minute more than eight hours. But the Nashik pilgrim bus belonged to a private contractor. The driver had been at the wheel for three days non-stop, with a few small halts in between.
“The tragedy was just waiting to happen.
Sahab, we have reached your destination. You must have had a long day at the office. Have a safe journey home and a good night’s sleep.”

Written by Raju Bist

January 8, 2010 at 11:14 pm

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Scene in a marriage – 1

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Wifey: Remember MM, our friend in Guwahati? Her doctor husband is going around with a physiotherapist.
Hubby: Hmmm…
Wifey: And I have just heard that KT’s husband is having an affair with a young office colleague.
Hubby: Lucky husbands. How come no one looks in this direction?
Wifey: Pull in your stomach, throw away your glasses, wear contact lens and use a wig… then see how girls start chasing you all over the place!

Written by Raju Bist

January 7, 2010 at 9:39 pm

Words of wisdom

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Just outside the shopping mall this morning, a young wife was photographing her little daughter near their car. Then the husband asked the elderly lady accompanying them to also come into the frame.
“Look at the dadi (paternal grandmother),” I told the wifey. “How happy she looks.”
“That’s the nani (maternal grandmother),” came the prompt, experienced reply. “Look at the wife. How happy she looks.”

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January 3, 2010 at 9:44 pm

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Blame it on…

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Blame it on SRK (Om Shanti Om), John Abraham (Dostana) and Aamir Khan (Ghajini).
Suddenly, every young man is talking of a well-tuned bod, never mind if he’s sporting signs of the first set of tyres around his middle.
As I was making my way to the pantry on the last day of 2008, I saw an office boy pulling his stomach in and impressing the cleaning lady: “Here, look at my six pack abs!”
Then his eyes fell on me, the stomach went back to its original position and the young man gave a sheepish grin.
On this hilarious note, here’s wishing you a very HAPPY 2009!!!

Written by Raju Bist

January 1, 2010 at 5:11 pm